Efes Dark Beer (Shawn's Review)

Holy Balls! I will start this review with that. Holy Balls can have two different connotations. One can say, “Holy Balls, that girl is unbelievably hot!”, which would imply a positive meaning. On the other hand, one can say, “Holy Balls, that is the nastiest beer I have ever put into my mouth.” I expect you can now guess which way this is going.

Here it is: Efes Dark Beer. Brewed in Turkey by Adadolu Efes Brewery. Remind me when I visit Turkey to bring my own stash!

The put a panther on the logo; they should have put a skunk with a rotted sphincter on the front. I opened the bottle and it smelled like a skunk; not skunky, but like a real live skunk! I didn’t want to continue, but the beer sampler must press on like Columbus into the New World!

I poured it into a glass hoping to allow it to air out. Its color is deep amber and is far less offensive than the smell. I dreaded the taste but was pleasantly surprised at the taste. It wasn’t great but it was far better than the smell. So like the world explorer, I pressed on.

Just as Joe Dirt believed he found a meteorite only to learn it was a pile of frozen, hardened air plane poo, Efes Dark had the same effect. The longer I drank it the worse it tasted. It seems that with most beers the more you drink the mouth becomes accustomed to the flavor and the rest goes down easy. That is not the case with Efes Dark. It continued to decline with each sip, probably after the 4th drink. I eventually had to pour it out.

J.T. had this to say about it: “I believe this to be the Milwaukee’s best of dark beer.” I couldn’t have said it better myself. Touche!